everything is about to change

exaggeration – not everything is going to change, maybe only 80% of everything.

why?

because tonight will be carrie’s last in this house.

tomorrow, she’ll be “leaving the nest, but not the home”.

although i don’t see her at home as often as i see mum or big b, i still see her. or evidence of her. i’ll see the opened pack of chips, or freshly cooked pasta, haloumi in the fridge, hairdryer out, shoes in the entrance. i can chuck her socks on her bed when they accidentally got taken in with my washing.

but now she’ll be gone for (almost) good and it’s really sad. all 18 years of my life i’ve had with a room near hers, but now i’ll only see her on sunday at church, or when she and her hUSBADN come ‘join us for dinner tomorrow night’. it’ll be so weird. she’s gone but not gone.

there will be a lot of things i miss about carrie, and of course i will miss carrie herself. i imagine that things will be very different when she leaves. first of all, her room will be replaced with all of bianca’s furniture. after years of suffering with the small rooms, closet-less rooms, study rooms and all-round ‘bad’ rooms, bianca is finally rightfully receiving the grandest room in the house, excluding the master bedroom.

anyway, back to carrie. i will list some things i will never experience again when she moves out tomorrow:

  • the princessy bedroom with her white vanity, makeup, and polaroid pictures
  • her walking briskly around the house
  • squeezing past her and the fridge (a sad, un-user-friendly kitchen layout; a serious bottleneck)
  • zither sounds
  • piano sounds 😦
  • her loud-as thudding steps in the hallway
  • her black bag hanging heavily off the dining-table chair
  • an overflowing shoe rack (SHE’D BETTER TAKE ALL HER SHOES WITH HER)
  • lots of tea
  • finding the hairdryer out
  • finding water all over the sink
  • random clothes/jewellery that she found in her closet and no longer wants
  • haloumi cheese
  • korean facewashes in the bathroom
  • new shampoos every now and then
  • random packages in the mail
  • delicious desserts from her work
  • random international cuisine in the fridge
  • 24/7 access to her makeup

there’s some good and some bad in there but they’re all gone now

THIS IS PRETTY SAD. I FEEL LIKE MY CHILDHOOD IS LEAVING ME. EVERYTHING I’VE EVER KNOWN IS ESCAPING. *hyperventilates*

should i skip makeup on her wedding day? i love crying but i don’t know if i’ll be more happy and excited, or more ‘moved by the beauty of it’. i really can’t guess but i’ll definitely update with what happens.

ta ta for now.

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